It started off innocently enough. Girl meets Hobbit at the match card tables. I asked him over to my place and he starts telling me his story. About how Hobbits wears shoes in Pico and that my oranges are the size of pumpkins to him. I said he may have one but he insisted they were too big to eat. I think he quite fancied me... asking me if I could cook, explaining to me how Hobbits only ate things raw because the axe was too heavy for them to carry to chop wood to make fire.
He finally worked up the nerve to ask how tall I was and when I asked him the same he responded, "Half of you." Our date lasted only a few minutes when I was rudely disconnected by my internet provider and so sadly I cannot tell you if a Hobbit kisses well. But if you're ever interested in dating Hobbits they are polite and very well mannered... he even offered me a cup of Hobbits Tea.